There is something magical about being outside in the fog as it overflows from the river, camera in hand, before the sun comes up on a crisp spring morning. The palette transforms from blue to grey to gold in a wave that can only experienced though patience and watchfulness. On a day when my youngest was moving through her own kind of palette, her life filling boxes, overflowing with all that she would need; I was up early, anxious in both good and bad ways to help her to transform herself as she moves out on her own. Unable to sleep in the dim grey light of night I walked though the house and caught a glimpse of the mist outside. This weather would give me an opportunity to capture some shots that would hopefully be worthy of hanging in her new house, images of the old, remembrances of where we last lived together… for her.
As I walked around our neighborhood, lurking around trees and fences and birdfeeders, peeping through yards and driveways I had time to reflect on the day ahead. This is what I had worked and hoped for over the last twenty some years. From the time I had my second daughter I had pushed for them to have a relationship that was close. When they were teens and fought relentlessly, I resorted to brainwashing, a technique that became a ‘go to’ manner of raising them. Initially I used this technique to try to convince my oldest into turning her little sister into a slave, the youngest only wanted to be around her, if only she would find ways to use that to her benefit rather than trying constantly to keep her away. It was a struggled for years and then one summer we had turned a corner. Maybe it was age and maturity, maybe it was that they both realized they were inextricably linked through a match in bone marrow we were fortunate enough to not have to resort to, maybe they were both just grateful that my oldest came home… It doesn’t matter why, it only matters that now as my youngest is getting ready to move she made the decision to move close to her sister and her sister is finally her closest friend.
I have plans for the bedroom that my youngest has occupied for the last number of years, with its wall of windows I plan on moving my photography into that room, making use of the light and space to create a space of my own. I have been looking forward to this for a while. I can’t fill that room fast enough… not because I want that space so desperately but because its emptiness is a reminder that time moves on, things transform from darkness to grey to gold and then back again, over and over. And change, regardless of how positive, is difficult and sometimes painful, though for now I’m focusing on the light, how it changes, the beauty of it and the peacefulness I need to draw from it as I move, and as my daughter moves later today.
Today is a day that is about finding comfort and I find comfort in the sunrise on a day filled with fog and mist and I find comfort in pasta, a food group I don’t eat as often as I’d like. I made these rolls a little while ago and they are delicious. Home made egg pasta cut into lasagna sized strips, the filling of ricotta, slow roasted tomatoes, ground dried mushrooms, mozzarella cheese and spinach. So good, so comforting, if only I could eat them every day!
Egg Pasta – rolled into strips about the size of lasagna (I used about 5 eggs and 2 1/2 cups flour, boiled for a couple of minutes, rinsed and set aside to fill.
- 500 gram container of ricotta
- 1 cup grated Mozzarella
- 1/4 cup ground dried mushrooms
- 1/2 cup slow roasted tomatoes, though you can use sun dried
- 1/2 cup chopped spinach
*The amount of filling will be dependent on how much pasta you have and want to fill.
Mix all the filling ingredients and allow to sit so that the mushroom crumbs have a chance to hydrate. Then spread the mixture along the pasta, roll, and stand up in a baking dish.
Once your dish is full, sprinkle with more grated cheese and oregano and dot with chunks of butter OR you can pour pasta sauce, my preference is minus the tomato/pasta sauce.
Bake at 350 degrees until all the cheese has melted and the rolls are hot. Serve immediately.